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Feeling Split In Two?

Uncategorized Dec 02, 2018

I used to be really tired, in fact, that's the whole reason why I talk so much about what real energy is and where illness comes from because in my own journey I discovered that it wasn't what I had been taught in school.

It wasn't what my functional medicine training had taught me. It wasn't just repair the adrenals. It wasn't just repair the thyroid. It wasn't that it just heal the gut. It wasn't a methylation disorder. It wasn't just toxicity. It wasn't just candida. I know because I tried to solve all of those.

What I discovered, the real cause is rooted five layers deeper than all of that. Those other things were at the surface, they were a conversation at the top, not a conversation deep in, and so I, like most people I had studied with had been looking at the wrong thing.

Sadly,  the consequences were really huge.

Maybe this will resonate with where you are, but back then, there were two of me...

The public me and the private me.

The public me smiled, was engaging, laughed, told jokes, and had space to listen to what people need.  

That was the Dr Julie Public me.

But the private me was tired, surly, prone to get snappish, didn't want to engage, hoped nobody needed me, and saw everything in life as a burden.

That's the me my family got

Because you can't bring a tired, worn-out person to work. So, I was spending a thousand times more effort to put on the face of a well balanced, happy public me so I could be successful in what I was doing and not burden people with just how worn out I really was. In the meantime, eating up every last ounce of patience, joy, creativity, and inspiration at work, leaving my family with…

A grouchy mom, a cranky, bitchy wife who didn’t want anything to do with sex, while getting more flabby and flubby every single day...how awesome is that?

I stopped making time for friends, because I didn’t have anything left to give, I stopped doing what I love because, by the time I had finished all of my obligations, all I had left was the energy to sit and watch TV.

The mere thought of meeting up with someone on a Friday night to have dinner was so exhausting, now, on Monday it might have sounded like a good idea, but, by Friday,  I was done and all I had was excuses why I wouldn’t be there.

That's where I lived.

Maybe some of you are living there right now, the public persona getting all of your energy while the real you, is getting drawn down so far, you know soon, there will only be one person and that person is going to be exhausted.  

For me, that exhaustion was brewing despite eating a 100% organic diet, despite not eating junk food, or sugar, while taking all the “right” adrenal support, Thyroid support, vitamins, iodine, probiotics, fermented foods, good fats and taking time to be still.  

How ridiculous is that...well, at least it taught me...it wasn’t about having random pieces, and it wasn’t about most of the testing methods out there or even about eating “clean” or low carb or keto.

As I was meditating on this the other day, I realized there's just one me now and that feels amazing. There's only been one me for a long time, but it really hit me how many people I talk to have two personas in their life. The real one….the truth of how they feel and the public one...how they present when needed.

How humiliating is it to be an impostor in so many interactions?

How humiliating is it to be an impostor with so many people you know? How guilty do you feel when your family gets the shitty you? Or When you don't have friends anymore because you could only give them the shitty you?

My clients get the same path that I got.

The path to cell restoration, the path to repairing all of those systems, the path to hormonal balance deeper than the adrenals or the thyroid, the path to inflammation control, the path to restoring the gut….The one path.

In my journey,  I finally found the pieces that cracked the code on having one path instead of 14 different ones that are slightly in opposition to each other.

The one path that lets it be restored for good, the one path that lets there be just one of you living your life so that every part of your life can get the best of you, including you.

What would it be to live from that place for you?

What would that do to your marriage for you to want to ravage your spouse?

What would it do to your friendships to have the energy to show up and compassionately love them as much as they love you?

What would it do to your kids, whether they're young or grown to be a mom that can be present and it's not forced or put on?

I can tell you from my own experience, it's huge

Truth is, there's a lot more love in the world when you're not too exhausted to share it.

If you want to know what that path might look like for you, book a call to speak with us and see IF we can help you.

Blessings

Dr. Julie

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